I recently asked a friend why she did not have a blog. She is intelligent, well spoken, and like most of the rest of us opinionated about most things. She told me that she is not narcissistic enough to need to have her thoughts out there for the world to read. And I thought to myself, Hmmmm?
I travel for my job - often. As I move around during my trips I text certain people in my life to keep them informed of where I am, and that I am safe. On Plane, at first layover, on second flight, arrived safely. As I amen route I guess I figured those who love me want to know I am okay. Recently one of my co-workers went on a trip. She did not play the text anyone game to allow us to know when she arrived, and we only knew she was home safely when we texted to ask her, even though she had been asked by our boss to check in. I asked why I did this automatically and the other woman did not. I was told that my coworker was more independent than I am and that I am needy. I always thought I was being considerate - I guess not.
These are not the first times in my life that I have been called needy. I had a previous partner who said I was way too needy. I don’t get it? I have been thinking about this a lot lately, because I am not a hundred percent sure what this all means!
What is it to be needy in a partnership, lovership, relationship? Is it needy to want a call to say good morning, goodnight, I love you? Is it needy to want someone to want to spend time with you when they can? Or to have someone who wants to hear about your day and wants to tell you about theirs? Is it needy to want someone who wants to lay down with you at night and wake with you in the morning?
What is it to be needy in a friendship? Is it needy to want to spend time with your friends? Is it needy to want to have a friend call you as often as you call them? Is it needy to want to be included in your friends important events or to have them included in yours? Is it needy to want a call every once in a while just to find out how you are and acceptance when you call for the same?
What is it to be needy at your place of employment? Is it needy to want an attagirl or a good job? Is it needy to want a list and acknowledgement of completion? Is it needy to want recognition for going above and beyond?
I guess if the answers to the above are yes, then I will have to accept to fact that if that is considered needy, I guess I am!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Was I This Dumb? or When Did I Turn Into My Mother?
I know I was no goody two shoes growing up. I got into my own fair share of trouble, some of it semi serious in nature. Some on my own, and some with the help of my "friends". But I don't remember ever being blatantly disobedient (being told no and then doing something anyway), or not knowing the consequences of my actions prior to acting them out.
I remember taking a flask of wine (Manischewitz mind you) to school in seventh grade and Mr.Lewis telling me it was a really dumb idea and I should get rid of it. We all (well most of us) do stupid things around alcohol at different times in our lives. Even now I have friends who might imbibe a little too much a little too often, but as adults we pay for our own crimes.
I remember getting caught shop lifting a package of D batteries with a friend, doing it clearly to find out if we could - which obviously we couldn't.
I remember driving through stop signs on purpose then slamming on the breaks on the other side laughing hysterically at the foolishness - always with a carload of friends and usually with many more than could fit safely in our station wagon.
I remember walking on the lawn of the mean guy who lived on the end of the block and writing nasty words in the frost - in the spring his grass was brown there and we giggled as he could not hide the swear words we plodded onto his lawn.
I remember borrowing my sisters working papers because I wanted to be older than I was for some reason and she gave them to me.
I remember breaking curfew.
I remember being rude and sometimes downright belligerent to my parents.
And that's just the short list because I can tell you clearly there is plenty that I don't remember, or that I really don't want to remember.
But today the things young people do seem so grievous to me - like having a party with alcohol in the house where everyone is underage when specifically being told no - and then being surprised that they are punished when the 'crime' is found out.
Like driving so fast that I hold the door and put my foot on the break that is definitely not on the passenger side of the car.
Like not caring about feelings of others - specifically their parents and how their words and actions affect those around them.
I wish I could figure out when the turning point came. When was it that what I considered fun and normal as I grew up turned into nonsense of teenagers and non thinking actions? As I watch the actions of young people and often have to live through the actions and reactions of my son, his friends and my nieces, nephews and cousins, it just comes to hit me in a horrendous way - When did I turn into my mother?
I remember taking a flask of wine (Manischewitz mind you) to school in seventh grade and Mr.Lewis telling me it was a really dumb idea and I should get rid of it. We all (well most of us) do stupid things around alcohol at different times in our lives. Even now I have friends who might imbibe a little too much a little too often, but as adults we pay for our own crimes.
I remember getting caught shop lifting a package of D batteries with a friend, doing it clearly to find out if we could - which obviously we couldn't.
I remember driving through stop signs on purpose then slamming on the breaks on the other side laughing hysterically at the foolishness - always with a carload of friends and usually with many more than could fit safely in our station wagon.
I remember walking on the lawn of the mean guy who lived on the end of the block and writing nasty words in the frost - in the spring his grass was brown there and we giggled as he could not hide the swear words we plodded onto his lawn.
I remember borrowing my sisters working papers because I wanted to be older than I was for some reason and she gave them to me.
I remember breaking curfew.
I remember being rude and sometimes downright belligerent to my parents.
And that's just the short list because I can tell you clearly there is plenty that I don't remember, or that I really don't want to remember.
But today the things young people do seem so grievous to me - like having a party with alcohol in the house where everyone is underage when specifically being told no - and then being surprised that they are punished when the 'crime' is found out.
Like driving so fast that I hold the door and put my foot on the break that is definitely not on the passenger side of the car.
Like not caring about feelings of others - specifically their parents and how their words and actions affect those around them.
I wish I could figure out when the turning point came. When was it that what I considered fun and normal as I grew up turned into nonsense of teenagers and non thinking actions? As I watch the actions of young people and often have to live through the actions and reactions of my son, his friends and my nieces, nephews and cousins, it just comes to hit me in a horrendous way - When did I turn into my mother?
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Bigotry, Ignorance and Hatred.
The year is 2011 and we still judge people and make comments on things that make little to no difference in our lives whatsoever. I am sickened and distressed by the small mindedness and the hatred from people who need to be looking at their own lives and not commenting on others!
"Them thars strong words little lady, what brang them on"
A few days ago, AOL did one of their little featurette blurbs on Ellen DeGeneres' vacation photos with her wife and what I suppose are her friends and family. They posted their pictures from St. Barts and I have to say that many of them were breathtaking views of the area. There were also photos of them doing vacation stuff. When viewing the photos you could feel they were having a good time and there was obvious love of each other and those who were there.
Now let me state, that in order to view these photos one had to click the link, then click through the photos. Not a lot of intelligence to do these steps, but an effort had to be made to push the buttons to view the pictures.
After the pictures there was the usual comment section. This is where my blood begins to boil, my blood pressure sky rockets, and I really am ready to lose my cool. Some of the comments were from negative hate mongers who just have to spoil a beautiful family moment. REALLY? It took effort to get to that part of the page. If you are not interested WHY GO THERE. And the things that people have the audacity to print about people they know nothing about is absurd.
Who has the right to judge what others do behind closed doors with another consenting adult? And why would anyone want to spew their ignorant bigoted blitherings on an open site?
I am not the sharpest crayon in the box, but a few of the things I learned a long time ago from my daddy were 1 - If you don't know what you are talking about don't talk, and 2 - If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all. In other words, keep your freakin mouth closed and maybe you'll learn something.
We live in a world today that is very different from where it was even ten years ago. We raise our children to be able to survive in this ever changing space they are in and as adults if you don't adapt to what is going on around you, you will fail! People spout off from religious points of view that its not right, from scientific points of view that its not natural. Well wake up and look around you - It is natural to be different in every species and even the religions - ALL OF THEM are taking a look at sexual difference to see where this fits today.
I don't like spinach or asparagus, and I am uninterested in extreme sports - all of which I have tried before I came to these conclusions. I certainly don't disparage anyone who likes these things. Don't knock it til you try it, and if its not for you after you do it, then at least have an open enough mind to know that to some people its for them!
"Them thars strong words little lady, what brang them on"
A few days ago, AOL did one of their little featurette blurbs on Ellen DeGeneres' vacation photos with her wife and what I suppose are her friends and family. They posted their pictures from St. Barts and I have to say that many of them were breathtaking views of the area. There were also photos of them doing vacation stuff. When viewing the photos you could feel they were having a good time and there was obvious love of each other and those who were there.
Now let me state, that in order to view these photos one had to click the link, then click through the photos. Not a lot of intelligence to do these steps, but an effort had to be made to push the buttons to view the pictures.
After the pictures there was the usual comment section. This is where my blood begins to boil, my blood pressure sky rockets, and I really am ready to lose my cool. Some of the comments were from negative hate mongers who just have to spoil a beautiful family moment. REALLY? It took effort to get to that part of the page. If you are not interested WHY GO THERE. And the things that people have the audacity to print about people they know nothing about is absurd.
Who has the right to judge what others do behind closed doors with another consenting adult? And why would anyone want to spew their ignorant bigoted blitherings on an open site?
I am not the sharpest crayon in the box, but a few of the things I learned a long time ago from my daddy were 1 - If you don't know what you are talking about don't talk, and 2 - If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all. In other words, keep your freakin mouth closed and maybe you'll learn something.
We live in a world today that is very different from where it was even ten years ago. We raise our children to be able to survive in this ever changing space they are in and as adults if you don't adapt to what is going on around you, you will fail! People spout off from religious points of view that its not right, from scientific points of view that its not natural. Well wake up and look around you - It is natural to be different in every species and even the religions - ALL OF THEM are taking a look at sexual difference to see where this fits today.
I don't like spinach or asparagus, and I am uninterested in extreme sports - all of which I have tried before I came to these conclusions. I certainly don't disparage anyone who likes these things. Don't knock it til you try it, and if its not for you after you do it, then at least have an open enough mind to know that to some people its for them!
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Let's Talk Exercise
This morning I took a beginning Zumba class at the local gym I belong to. If anyone wanted to watch a comedy skit in the making they only needed to be outside the room watching the seven women inside struggling valiently to follow the instructor in moves that wiggle the hips, thrust the pelvis and generally move the body in ways I don't believe my body has ever moved, nor, honestly, ever wanted my body to move! I mean seriously!
Lets start at the beginning. I hate to sweat. Sometimes the weather makes it so my body needs to cool itself so it perspires, but why would a somewhat sane and otherwise normal person purposely set themselves up to be uncomfortable and in for pain? I know some people say that they feel great after they exercise and feel horrible if they do not exercise. Let me emphatically state that I am not one of those people! The only reason I subject myself to the ritual of getting myself up early and getting my body to the gym is because if I did not, my shape would be BLOB. As it is, it often feels like daughter of blob!
There are exercises I do like. I love raquetball. My obvious reason for this is that I get to smash something and the ball never has to be chased too far away! To me this is a fun way to spend an hour. However the club I belong to has no courts, and I have not played in about 12 years so I probably would need to relearn to be any good, or at least passable.
Another exercise I like is actually dancing. I love to contra dance. Get instructions, keep swapping who you are dancing with, spin around, move, and everyone seems to be having a good time. In this area there are some wicked good dances and often there is a live band and plenty of people to dance with ( I might do a blog on this some other time so I won't go into too much detail now). Problem with Contra dancing is you do need to have other people, and after the third or fourth dance I need to sit down or throw up from all the spinning.
There are exercises that I absolutely despise - for instance, the exercise bike. Very similar to the treadmill in that you do a lot of work to GO NOWHERE, but worse, because when you are done your butt hurts. If I am going to ride a bike, I will go with my nice padded granny seat and feel some wind in my face, not just sit in place. Group aerobics is another of the things I hate. Nothing worse than feeling like you are going to die than doing so in a room of fifteen year olds who are ready to go another day and a half with an instructor screaming at you the whole time to "pick it up ladies, no use having sagging parts now".
Anyway, so here I am in the class, younger than most of the participants by an easy 20 years (except for the stick figure teaching the class who can't be more than 25) and not able to do any of the movements. Yes I can position two - right foot right, lift left put it back down and bring right foot back, then repeat to left. The foot motions aint the problem. I definitely do not have the swing of the hips thing happening. And its not so bad in slow motion, but play the music up to tempo and I might as well be running the boston marathon!
I think I will stick to my water aerobics and Wii (not together). Round is still a shape!
Lets start at the beginning. I hate to sweat. Sometimes the weather makes it so my body needs to cool itself so it perspires, but why would a somewhat sane and otherwise normal person purposely set themselves up to be uncomfortable and in for pain? I know some people say that they feel great after they exercise and feel horrible if they do not exercise. Let me emphatically state that I am not one of those people! The only reason I subject myself to the ritual of getting myself up early and getting my body to the gym is because if I did not, my shape would be BLOB. As it is, it often feels like daughter of blob!
There are exercises I do like. I love raquetball. My obvious reason for this is that I get to smash something and the ball never has to be chased too far away! To me this is a fun way to spend an hour. However the club I belong to has no courts, and I have not played in about 12 years so I probably would need to relearn to be any good, or at least passable.
Another exercise I like is actually dancing. I love to contra dance. Get instructions, keep swapping who you are dancing with, spin around, move, and everyone seems to be having a good time. In this area there are some wicked good dances and often there is a live band and plenty of people to dance with ( I might do a blog on this some other time so I won't go into too much detail now). Problem with Contra dancing is you do need to have other people, and after the third or fourth dance I need to sit down or throw up from all the spinning.
There are exercises that I absolutely despise - for instance, the exercise bike. Very similar to the treadmill in that you do a lot of work to GO NOWHERE, but worse, because when you are done your butt hurts. If I am going to ride a bike, I will go with my nice padded granny seat and feel some wind in my face, not just sit in place. Group aerobics is another of the things I hate. Nothing worse than feeling like you are going to die than doing so in a room of fifteen year olds who are ready to go another day and a half with an instructor screaming at you the whole time to "pick it up ladies, no use having sagging parts now".
Anyway, so here I am in the class, younger than most of the participants by an easy 20 years (except for the stick figure teaching the class who can't be more than 25) and not able to do any of the movements. Yes I can position two - right foot right, lift left put it back down and bring right foot back, then repeat to left. The foot motions aint the problem. I definitely do not have the swing of the hips thing happening. And its not so bad in slow motion, but play the music up to tempo and I might as well be running the boston marathon!
I think I will stick to my water aerobics and Wii (not together). Round is still a shape!
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